Relationships are very interesting things. I had been in quite a few before I met my wife and just like organisational team formation goes through the facets of forming, storming, norming, performing, so it is with relationships.
Especially when you are in LOVE.
Ooooh. You look into your partners eyes and think, I will love you forever. I want to always be with you. I feel so close to you.
Well, that was before the first really smelly fart, the morning look...maybe even a little dried out drool, the passionate snore, the swearing, the anger at losing a game, the excessive love for whatever they love. That's when the Illuminati concept of hiding in plain sight hits you.
All along, your partner was...
Not Superman with his constant "S" perm, or Wonder Woman with constant make-up...and there are such real concepts as 'morning breath' and 'a foul mood'.
So people say, 'the relationship went sour'. She went from size 4 to 24, and other such things. They break up and start again - with another human being who poos, farts, sweats, and has mood swings LIKE WE ALL DO!
But as providence will have it, I stumbled on a game where you are allowed to BLAME your partner!
All you BOTH need to do is keep tabs of ALL the things the OTHER person does that annoys you.
You keep tabs of ALL the things YOU do that annoys your partner.
Yup, all your weaknesses that you are struggling with. Just the FEW things like thoughtless spending, foul language, funny mouth noises, snoring, drooling, dry jokes, pointless conversation, logorrhea (constantly talking!), nagging, always forgeting, not excercising constantly, burning up meals, not getting involved in house chores, being out late constantly, not knowing when NOT to joke, being constantly weird, not calling, not buying gifts, always correcting, always reminding, being constantly defensive, eating too much, sleeping too much...
When you have tabled all your annoying, off-putting behaviour (that your partner is LIVING with), all you need do is think about YOUR OWN mess up, when your partner annoys you.
That is the BLAME GAME on steroids, if you wish
(Blushing in my black skin)
It has kept me fairly humble because YOU mess up just as bad as your partner. Your searchlight was just always in the wrong direction. We tend to be overly angry with someone else when we have a false sense of how 'good' we ASSUME we are.
So your partners ain't so bad afterall, are they.
It's worked for me. Hopefully, it might do the same for you.
:) Have a fun day...
(NOTICE: The couple above are married.)
Disclaimer: This article does not deal directly with abusive relationships. That is a very different subject matter.